Giving and Generosity

I do not believe one can settle how much we ought to give. I’m afraid the only safe rule is to give more than we can spare….if our expenditure on comforts, luxuries, and amusement, is up to the standard common of those with the same income as our own, we are probably giving away too little.   C.S. Lewis

This quotation from C.S. Lewis challenges our ideas about giving and generosity.

We see people who live much beyond their income for many years, then it catches up with them. They are strapped with debt, unwilling to follow God’s will in spending or in giving. They end up in bondage (not enjoying what they have) or in bankruptcy (enjoying what they have at someone else’s expense).

We see others who live within their means but spend most of their money on themselves and their family. They spend money on vacations, entertainment, their house, or new cars, but rarely give to God’s work.

We don’t give to get, but we firmly believe that you cannot “out give” God. We have experienced it ourselves and seen others that continue to give more and more but God still meets all of their needs.

Generosity is a “readiness or liberality in giving.”

What stands in our way from generous giving?

Generosity is a condition of the heart. When we are unwilling to give, we may not have a heart for God’s work. We may not have compassion for the poor or disadvantaged. Or we may have such a fear of the future, that we are unwilling to turn loose of our money.

God is trustworthy. He has told us that when we follow Him and His principles that He will meet our needs. The question is whether we are trustworthy. As defined in the parable of the talents (Matthew 25), God wants us to acknowledge that He has given us everything that we have and that we are to follow His guidance on where and how we are to spend His money.

Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to.        (Deuteronomy 15:10)

The place to begin …..

A wise lover values not so much the gift of the lover as the love of the giver. Thomas A. Kempis

Generosity begins with giving of ourselves in time, emotions, and money. 

The majority of Christians are not willing to give even a tithe. A recent survey shows that among born-again Christians, only 9% tithe. One cannot be generous if he does not give.

The place to begin generosity is the basic principle of giving. We only give to God’s work and according to His will if we truly love Him above all else. Once we truly love Him, we must believe that He is trustworthy.

Do I trust Him enough to follow Him, ....
even if His direction seems "irrational" to me?

Reason says that you don’t give if you aren’t paying all of your bills.

God’s Word says "Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty. (Malachi 3:10)

Our personal testimony is that we began tithing at the point in our financial lives that we had the lowest income and could least “afford” it. But God was faithful. We never missed a meal and all bills got paid. We pray about how He wants us to spend the 100%, not just 10%. It all belongs to Him.

Read testimony of a young couple and giving ....
Read about generosity in marriage and with others....

Marriage Glue

One of the main causes of marital friction is financial matters.

Theoretically speaking, managing family finances according to a written spending plan is pretty straightforward and not really that hard to establish. But typically in married couples, there is likely to be a spender and a saver. That complicates matters and makes it critical for husbands and wives to learn to work together as a team. Being different is not a bad thing and it doesn’t mean one spouse is inferior to the other. God puts us together to complete one another, to use our different gifts and abilities to enhance the marriage, and it takes two people working together as one to succeed.

God wants to use conflict to bond couples together as they work through conflict. This includes financial issues. Even money challenges can bring the two closer together.

*Instead of letting money become a wedge that divides a marriage, God intends for it to be one of the glues that brings about true oneness.*

We all enter into marriage with strengths and weaknesses. The differences between spouses concerning financial matters can stem from our gender, backgrounds, personalities, and even our relationship with God. If we fail to understand those differences, deep hurt can result. But working together as a team, recognizing that those differences actually fill “gaps” in each other lives, can result in marriages where finances are a strength not a weakness.

Whenever financial matters start getting out of hand in a marriage, the first thing to do is to pray. There is absolutely no substitute for God’s answer. Iit’s best if husbands and wives pray together some are not at that point, at least pray individually). We ask the Lord for His direction and for wisdom regarding our finances. We simply ask God what He wants us to do with the money entrusted to us by Him. Remember He owns it all, but has made us managers (stewards) over some of it for a purpose and we should always remember to ask what His plans are!

Good communication and planning are essential for success. It’s a matter of determining where we are financially, having a mutually agreed upon, fair plan, and talking about it (calmly and regularly). “With all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing forbearance to one another in love” (Ephesians 4:2). Agreeing as a couple about financial decisions and goals requires loving consideration, usually some compromise, and maybe even involve sacrifice from both partners.

If the financial problems and/or communication issues are intense, most couples need to seek outside help to get on track. Seeking counsel for marriage or financial problems should be as normal as seeking medical counsel when we’re sick. “Without consultation, plans are frustrated, but with many counselors they succeed.” (Proverbs 15:22)

We cannot prevent every difficulty and we can’t dodge every conflict in marriage, but we can prepare to survive them by building a solid relationship with God, a healthy marriage, and stable finances. Don’t forget – difficulties are opportunities to grow into the couple God wants us to be!

More Money

More money seems to be the solution to everything.

If kids are doing poorly in school, let's spend more money on education.
If we have a drug problem in our state, let's spend more money on police, prison, and drug education.
If I had a fight with my wife, I'll spend a lot on a nice evening out to appease her.
If the kids throw a fit in the store, I'll buy them something to keep them quiet.

And when we are in a financial bind, the solution is more money! If I don't have the things in life that I want, I just need more money to be happy. If I bill collectors are calling, I just need more money.

What if I told you that more money is not the solution to any of those problems?

Most people don't know how much they spend on any given area per month. Of those who do know, very few plan how they are going to spend their money. Expenses just happen.

No matter who you consult for advice about finances or money management, one of the first steps they will ask someone to take is to figure out how much he is spending in every area of his life - home, cars, medical, etc. One of the next steps is to determine how much he can/should spend on each area - a spending plan.

More money is not the answer, but managing the money God has given us is the answer.

The concept is not rocket science but it is often hard for people to navigate on their own. We didn't have anyone to help us. We made one attempt, couldn't figure it out, went back to it five years later. We were so excited about what a spending plan did for our money, our state of mind, and our marriage that we told all of our friends. Then we trained in how to teach others this great concept.

We are offering a class at a special price, just $10 for the notebook, starting Sunday, February 20th. See this page for more details on the six-week class.

If you answer any of these questions with a "yes," this class will benefit you.

• Does it put you in a bind to have unexpected expenses?
• Do you wonder where all the money went?
• Do you ever argue with your spouse and/or parents about money?
• Do you owe money, other than on your mortgage?
• Do you ever arguments in your marriage over money?
• Do you want to tithe and/or save but don't feel that you can afford to?
• Do you worry about having enough money to pay the bills?
• Do you live paycheck to paycheck?
• Do you worry about having enough for retirement/college?

More money is not the answer but we will help you find God's solution.