LIVING WELL in 2010 - Strengthening Marriages

How far into marriage was I when I realized that I didn't know what was I doing?

I guess it was somewhere in my first year. I knew that I didn't really know any couples whose marriages I wanted to emulate. I knew that I didn't have any specific training on marriage; I had not even read a book. I knew that the person to whom I had committed the rest of my life could hurt me more than anyone, without even trying. And I didn't know anyone to seek for advice or anywhere to go. I thought I was smart enough to figure it out .... wrong!!!!

Finally, the Lord did a great work in my heart and I started looking towards Him for answers. Then I discovered Dr. Dobson. His radio program along with many books, friends, mentors, seminars, and classes began to show me His way. It worked ... still together after 36 years!

But those agonizing first years of marriage showed me how hard it is for a good marriage to just happen! Great marriages, yes, even good marriages take outside help! God drew my heart and Ed's heart to be catalysts in other couples' lives to strengthen their marriages.

We are more committed to strengthen marriages in 2010 than ever before. We will be teaching a retreat January 22-23 in Chickasha, a men's breakfast in south Oklahoma City on February 13, an 8-week class at a church in Oklahoma City starting February 14, and another seminar in Ponca City February 20-21. That is just the next two months!

And every week, we minister to couples in our office, giving them guidance to heal and strengthen their marriages.

We see God work in a way that we have not seen in any other area of ministry. I have done women's ministry, written Bible study literature for adults and kids, trained teachers and lay counselors. Ed has led men's ministry, developed a benevolence ministry, and been a deacon and church staff member. However, we both agree, marriage ministry is God's call on our life as a couple.

LIVING WELL in 2010 - Preparing for Marriage

We often wish God would show us what is ahead for us. If He had shown me what was ahead for 2009, I might have told Him "never mind, can I skip 2009?" But His answer to me would have been the same as to Paul "my grace is sufficient." And it was.

So, we pray and ask God what He wants and listening closely to follow Him.

God showed us years ago that Christ-like marriages were very close to His heart. His passion became our passion. How does a person have a Christ-like marriage? First, having Christ in his/her life is a non-negotiable.

Second, preparing for the marriage early can make a huge difference. We started teaching a Preparing for Marriage class 15 years ago. We now see young, strong Christian families, some have several children, who came through that class.

What we see new for us in 2010 is holding the class in a "neutral site," instead of in our church. We see a growing interest on the part of young people to prepare, but they can't always find it in their own church or they are often unconnected to a local church.

The beautiful setting of the Old Paseo Chapel is the setting for our class beginning January 18. We believe that God wants us to reach some new couples in a new way. How many of us wish we had some/any teaching to get us ready for a lifetime together? The most exciting and rewarding part of marriage ministry is seeing these couples set the course of the journey together in the right direction.

More about what is ahead in our next post.

Tanzania Mission 2009 Highlights